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Guest Column

April 21, 2000

Jeanne Broberg

After a traumatic drive from California to New York with four small

children, we decided for the return, two years and one more baby later,

that I would fly with the three youngest.

My husband was helping us board the plane. Our 2-year-old refused to

sit down. My husband could not persuade him. An unknown passenger across

the aisle calmly came over, offered to help and took our 2-year-old son

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in his arms.

With love, this stranger gently persuaded our son to happily sit down

and be buckled. We have never forgotten that true good Samaritan and the

lesson he taught us.

Disciplining takes time, love and great self-discipline on the

parents' part. It's when we are too tired or too busy to discipline that

we lose control ourselves and lose the ability to discipline with love.

We can't make idle threats. We must take the mental time to determine

the consequences of a threat and whether we will want to carry it out.

Then, if called for, follow through.

Disciplining is a private thing, between the parent and child. With

love, it is even a bonding between the parent and child. Relaxed

discipline necessitates time as a family, without neighbors, friends or

even grandparents around.

Don't forget humor, always a soothing salve. My husband would often

say, "I'll give you till the count of 10 to ----" And then, with a big

grin, "One, 10!"

Remember there is negotiable and non-negotiable behavior.

What is REALLY important? Robbing a bank we cannot tolerate, but,

really, who cares if a child's room is clean.

Television and now computers are great family projects. The computer

and television should be in a family room where we can plan time and

choice of programs together.

One of our visiting adult sons noticed the "list" on the counter that

I had prepared for a talk on raising children.

"What's this, Mom?"

"Oh, notes for a talk I've been invited to give."

"What's this 'No TV on school nights?' "

"Why that's the way we lived."

"Well", he said, "there was at least no TV on school nights when Mom

or Dad were home."

We learn from our kids. Yes, we as parents need to be home, loving,

nurturing and enjoying family time.

JEANNE BROBERG is a member of the Women's Relief Society of the

Verdugo Hills 1st Ward of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

in La Crescenta. She and her husband, Dr. Charles Broberg, a local

obstetrician/gynecologist, have raised eight children and now have 16

grandchildren. Jeanne is in her seventh year as part of the La Canada

Unified School district School Board.

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