? Teaching me how to drive. Talk about high blood pressure. If you hadn't explained to me how to make U-turns, drive in traffic and all other things driving-related, I'm pretty sure my slow reflexes and erratic car skills would have killed me by now.
? Teaching me all those philosophical lessons (like making lemonade when life hands you lemons) that I have not learned to, but might someday, appreciate.
? Taking me to the DMV multiple times to get my license. We've driven all over LA County and beyond just for me to get a little card that'll allow me to join the ranks of all the other dangerous teenage drivers. I'm sure it's been a hassle driving me from Pasadena to Montebello to Newhall, especially since I still haven't been able to get my license, but hey, it was worth a shot, and someday it'll be a story worth telling.
? Not naming me Susan. (Note: No offense to all the Susans out there, of course, but I'm really much happier with my own name.)
? Being so physically fit. Your constant weightlifting and endless amounts of whole grain bread drive me nuts (and make me slightly embarrassed when my friends see you raising dumbbells in your Sunday clothes), but at least it makes me feel guilty enough to eat one less candy bar.
? Insisting that I take all those Tae Kwon Do and Karate lessons because even though it gives me a tendency to be a little violent when I'm angry, at least I'll know how to deal with the shady people that you always warn me about when I go to college.
? Giving me all the genes from your side of the family. I've got the fat toes, asthma, a somewhat asymmetrical face, an under bite, and on the plus side, all my good looks come from you since everyone says I'm the spitting image of you.
Like I told Mommy, hopefully after the 18 years (and counting) you've spent making sure that I grow up to be a decent human being, you don't feel like it's been a complete waste and that you're somewhat happy with how I turned out.
Happy Father's Day.