Jokes

Gary Moskowitz BURBANK -- Glenn Temple stood on stage, dressed in his white cowboy hat, white shirt, black Wrangler jeans, white belt and white, ankle-high, zip-up boots with Playboy bunny insignias on them. "I'm just doing the same thing I was doing in the '40s," joked the 76-year-old Glendale resident. "There's nowhere in America I haven't played. I've played gigs at schools, on the radio, at barn dances and in movie houses in between flicks." Temple, who hasn't picked up his guitar in more than a year, gave his wife, Vancy, a hug during his return performance at the Veterans of Foreign Wars, USS Gudgeon Ship No. 8310 of Burbank Saturday night.

Jackson Bell A fringe benefit the United States Postal Service has unintentionally given Louis Kapustin for his half-century of service came from simply working his shift here -- lower cholesterol levels. Kapustin, 69, of Temple City said there is a history of high cholesterol in his family, and his doctor told him that all those years of hoofing parcels to Glendale residents have helped maintain his heart health. "Look at me now," said Kapustin, a slim and energetic man. "I'm not fat, and I'm in pretty good shape."

Sir Walter Scott (not Shakespeare) said, "Oh what a tangled web we weave/When first we practice to deceive." Its use is one of the first errors in "The Perfect Man." In case the audience is too dense to pick up on the film's premise, it appears for our benefit in writing -- on a blackboard. The film does not trust our intelligence nor does it trust its own. For its part, the audience will not be fooled. Moviegoers will see that an expert cast like this one could appeal to a broad spectrum of entertainment seekers, but doesn't.

Robert G. Phipps GLENDALE -- Those who wish to write and produce for television can feel encouraged. A nepotistic media-mogul parent is not the only key. Intelligence, talent and life experiences -- negative as well as positive -- can open the way, as evidenced by lifetime encounters of Glendale resident Andrea Abbate. Abbate, who moved to Glendale in late 1997, has just completed her third season as a writer and executive producer on Showtime TV's dramatic comedy series, "Rude Awakening."

The Falcon Theatre’s weekend children’s show, “The Enchanted Nightingale,” was originally one of Hans Christian Andersen’s fairy tales. Unfortunately, when it comes to the moral of this tale, the Falcon’s version has strayed a little too far from the original. But while leading you down its alternate path, the Falcon’s “Enchanted Nightingale” offers a few other riches along the way. The greatest share of the praise belongs to set designer Sherry Santillano and composer Rachael Lawrence.

Alecia Foster SOUTHEAST GLENDALE -- Kristine Isayan's tears were interrupted by occasional smiles as she talked about her best friend, Anoush Gevorkyan. Anoush was an energetic young woman who loved spending time with her friends. "She'd always play jokes on us," Isayan remembered. "I thought this was a joke at first." Isayan received a phone call Wednesday night telling her her friend was dead. Anoush, a senior at Glendale High School, had been exercising that evening when she collapsed.

Matt Walker’s Troubies have been mashing up pop culture with the back catalogs of music icons since 1995. The well is running dry on worthy source material, but “Frosty the Snow Manilow” at the Falcon Theatre in Burbank proves that barely matters anymore. Walker and his impressive company take their game up a notch and reach a state of grace forever balanced between reverence and rudeness. His players take no prisoners in their pursuit of laughter, even if it’s at the expense of audience members or fellow cast-mates.

Devoted followers of Mike Myers will gain some inspirational comedy and romantic guidance by making an appointment to see ?The Love Guru.? It?s a polarizing and harmless little film that some will love and others will loathe. Guru Pitka (Myers) is the second most popular guru in the world and he has lived his entire life in the shadow of his nemesis, Deepak Chopra. Pitka thinks he can dethrone Deepak by appearing on ?The Oprah Winfrey Show,? but he needs a hook to get booked. In order to score some positive press, Pitka goes to work for the Toronto Maple Leafs to help reconcile the marriage of their star hockey player, Darren Roanoke.

Will Rogers Science fiction is filled with tales of hideous creatures that grow larger and more powerful by feeding on the energy foes generate trying to do battle with them. That's what comes to mind every time I watch Glendale's design review boards in action. From the "Blob" to an invisible power threatening the Enterprise in a classic episode of TV's "Star Trek," there are countless fictional examples of weird beings confronting innocent citizens.

If you smoke cigarettes, like satire and you're a fan Aaron Eckhart, you should fire one up for the comedy "Thank You For Smoking." If you're trying to quit the habit or you're under 18, skip this film and buy a pack of gum instead. Eckhart stars as Nick Naylor, a tobacco lobbyist on a mission to prove that cigarettes are not bad for you. The film is based on the book of the same title and it chronicles Nick's life as he does his job to "pay the mortgage." Nick also brings his son with him so he can show the boy what he actually does for a living.